It is official...I have graduated.
At 44 I have graduated from something for the first time in my life. It feels really great to be done! I've had my graduation party, and it was pretty awesome to look at all those precious babies and the incredible moms who let me be a part of their birth. There were some pretty cool pictures taken at the party of me with most of the moms and babies who were there. I loved it! It was such a great time for me and my family.
Now, we move back to San Angelo in one week...moving at Christmas again. I've promised the kids that next year we will NOT move in December! WE have missed celebrating Christmas in our usual ways with all the moves around Christmas time ~ this makes the 3rd one in a row!
I'm looking forward to spending a lot more time at home and getting to reconnect with my family. I still have studying to do for the NARM, but I will get to do it from HOME! I have missed being home more than anyone will ever know...
More about all the feelings wrapped up in that another time.
For now, I HAVE GRADUATED!
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Honest Thoughts...Stressful Emotions
I have decided life will not slow down anytime soon, and I will just have to figure out someway to keep up with it, no matter how fast it's going by. I'm not sure what all that is going to require, or what will need to change along the way, but I'm really feeling the passage of time these days, and that I'm missing out on so much that I want to grab hold of...I miss the days when I got to stay home with my kids. When I knew what they were wearing each day (not that their clothes are really important, but I KNEW!). When I knew what they were reading, studying, thinking, laughing about. It seems that days go by, and I haven't even gotten to look at their faces. And then on the days I do get to be home, there are so many things that are so far behind, I don't get to just stop and enjoy them then, either.
I'm really struggling right now with all the sacrifices my family is making for me to become a midwife. I know (I think) that this is what I'm supposed to be doing ~ but was the time now? If not, then when?
I will most likely miss my daughters RN graduation and pinning ceremony because I have many clients due in May. She is 3 and a half hours away from me. I want to be there to encourage her and congratulate her! She has worked hard for that degree, and I'll miss it.
I feel the need to go see my oldest son and help him walk through some choices he's making ~ but I can't leave. There is always a baby due. I haven't had 2 days in a row off in several weeks.
I haven't gotten to cook a meal for my family in ages. If they were dependent upon me to feed them, they would all have starved long ago. Haley does an incredible job of taking care of them in the food department (and many others), but I miss that simple act of nurturing that was mine for so long!
The boys are growing up, literally, right before my eyes, and I'm missing so much of it. Is it worth it? Sometimes I really wonder.
I was looking through the pictures taken with my camera in 2009 last night, and I don't know when most of them were taken. I didn't get to be a part of what was happening. I've missed Robert's birthday ~ again this year. I have to work on Josiah's birthday ~ again this year. What else will I miss?
I love taking care of the women I have the privilege of serving during pregnancy and birth. It is such an important time in their lives and I am grateful for the opportunity to be a light in their path and help them become all God has designed them to be. But at what expense?
I see the many ways God has filled the gap that has been created...Robert has stepped up to the plate regarding homeschooling in ways I never imagined in my wildest dreams would ever really happen! It has been great to see ~ but I want us to be able to work together in the training of our children. It was never just my job, and it's not supposed to be just his job. I can't do that when I'm not here.
Haley feeds us all wonderful meals, 3 times a day! She has filled in for me in so many ways, and I couldn't even begin to do what I'm doing if it weren't for her presence and willingness to be a keeper at home in my place ~ but it's my home, and sometimes I want to be the keeper!
P.S. This was written on April 9, 2009, and I never posted it, in large part because life really never did slow down...it's now November 5, and I can really see the light at the end of the tunnel! Just 6 more weeks and I will be done with my training! There are so many things I want to get down on 'paper' so I will rememberall, most, a few of the things God has done in the last 7 months.
But for now, this is one of the places I have been...
I'm really struggling right now with all the sacrifices my family is making for me to become a midwife. I know (I think) that this is what I'm supposed to be doing ~ but was the time now? If not, then when?
I will most likely miss my daughters RN graduation and pinning ceremony because I have many clients due in May. She is 3 and a half hours away from me. I want to be there to encourage her and congratulate her! She has worked hard for that degree, and I'll miss it.
I feel the need to go see my oldest son and help him walk through some choices he's making ~ but I can't leave. There is always a baby due. I haven't had 2 days in a row off in several weeks.
I haven't gotten to cook a meal for my family in ages. If they were dependent upon me to feed them, they would all have starved long ago. Haley does an incredible job of taking care of them in the food department (and many others), but I miss that simple act of nurturing that was mine for so long!
The boys are growing up, literally, right before my eyes, and I'm missing so much of it. Is it worth it? Sometimes I really wonder.
I was looking through the pictures taken with my camera in 2009 last night, and I don't know when most of them were taken. I didn't get to be a part of what was happening. I've missed Robert's birthday ~ again this year. I have to work on Josiah's birthday ~ again this year. What else will I miss?
I love taking care of the women I have the privilege of serving during pregnancy and birth. It is such an important time in their lives and I am grateful for the opportunity to be a light in their path and help them become all God has designed them to be. But at what expense?
I see the many ways God has filled the gap that has been created...Robert has stepped up to the plate regarding homeschooling in ways I never imagined in my wildest dreams would ever really happen! It has been great to see ~ but I want us to be able to work together in the training of our children. It was never just my job, and it's not supposed to be just his job. I can't do that when I'm not here.
Haley feeds us all wonderful meals, 3 times a day! She has filled in for me in so many ways, and I couldn't even begin to do what I'm doing if it weren't for her presence and willingness to be a keeper at home in my place ~ but it's my home, and sometimes I want to be the keeper!
P.S. This was written on April 9, 2009, and I never posted it, in large part because life really never did slow down...it's now November 5, and I can really see the light at the end of the tunnel! Just 6 more weeks and I will be done with my training! There are so many things I want to get down on 'paper' so I will remember
But for now, this is one of the places I have been...
Sunday, March 15, 2009
It is Finished!
The schoolwork is all done! I passed, and now we're down to the homestretch.
Last week was a great boost to my birth numbers ~ 4 births in one week! It was great, and I still absolutely love that God has allowed me to be a part of this world of pregnancy and birth. I do wish the workshop weeks weren't quite so intense though. For my last 4 workshops, the week before was filled with births. Don't get me wrong, I love the births, but when they come all at once, the week of a workshop, it does get a little bit tiring.
Hopefully now I'll have more time to blog, and keep up with things (and people) at home. I can think about unpacking those last few nagging boxes that are going to take 'thinking' through, I can be more a part of school for the kids. Robert has done a wonderful job of taking that responsibility on for the last few months, and he will continue to be a key part of homeschooling our boys, but I hope to be more of a help to him in the coming years than I've been the last few months, especially.
I hope to get caught up on a lot of things, and maybe I'll blog about them as they happen. In the meantime, I'm just praising the Lord for all He has done, and is doing, in my life. He is so faithful, even when I'm not, and I'm so very grateful He loves me.
Blessings,
k_ranae
Last week was a great boost to my birth numbers ~ 4 births in one week! It was great, and I still absolutely love that God has allowed me to be a part of this world of pregnancy and birth. I do wish the workshop weeks weren't quite so intense though. For my last 4 workshops, the week before was filled with births. Don't get me wrong, I love the births, but when they come all at once, the week of a workshop, it does get a little bit tiring.
Hopefully now I'll have more time to blog, and keep up with things (and people) at home. I can think about unpacking those last few nagging boxes that are going to take 'thinking' through, I can be more a part of school for the kids. Robert has done a wonderful job of taking that responsibility on for the last few months, and he will continue to be a key part of homeschooling our boys, but I hope to be more of a help to him in the coming years than I've been the last few months, especially.
I hope to get caught up on a lot of things, and maybe I'll blog about them as they happen. In the meantime, I'm just praising the Lord for all He has done, and is doing, in my life. He is so faithful, even when I'm not, and I'm so very grateful He loves me.
Blessings,
k_ranae
Thursday, January 1, 2009
Happy New Year!
HAPPY NEW YEARS! MAY YOU ALL EXPERIENCE THE PRESENCE OF GOD IN A VERY REAL AND PERSONAL WAY THIS YEAR AS YOU SERVE HIM AND CONTINUE TO GROW TO LOVE HIM WITH YOUR WHOLE HEART.
That is truly my goal this year ~ to become more and more Christlike every moment of every day ~ to truly love Him with all of my heart, mind, soul and strength. I am so full of myself and thoughts about me, that it breaks my heart when I realize how little of my life I truly spend being with or even thinking about the Lord. I know that some of the things I'm doing (most I hope) are things He has called me to do, but if I let those things keep me from worshipping at the feet of my Father, then I am letting the enemy of God win the battle. So, Father, in the midst of the daily things of life, teach me to keep my focus on You. In some things that is easier to do than others, but I want to glorify You in all that I do, say, think and dream. Help me to seek FIRST Your Kingdom, and let You worry about the rest.
In that vein...
I got my schoolwork back yesterday from the last workshop, and I only missed 1 1/2 questions! That calls for some serious praising the Lord! So, I just have to turn in those corrections, do my two worksheets, build a perineal model, and write all of my protocols before March ~ sounds doable! And then, I'm done with the academic portion of my schooling. I just have to get those clinical hours in, and they are coming. I am up to 5 personal clients (under supervision of course) and I so love working with them. They are all wonderful mamas, and I am so excited to be able to help them have the best pregnancy, labor, birth and postpartum possible! Please pray with me that I would be continually seeking to grow in wisdom from the Lord regarding their care, and that I would also grow in knowledge and the instruction of those God has placed over me ~ Molly and Kim are the best!
We have spent the last 2 days getting the boys room all put together with their new beds. We found a bunk bed with a trundle AND storage drawers so all 3 are in one unit. Then we also rearranged their whole room making sure there was a place for everything that needs to go in their room. Everyone worked so hard, but the results are worth every second! It looks wonderful. I don't have any pictures yet, but I'll try to get some taken tomorrow and posted so you can all see it. At least the 3 of you who actually read my blog :-)! Interestingly enough, getting the boys room cleaned up wasn't on my list of things to do, so I better go put it there so I can cross it off!
We rang in the New Year by learning a new card game. Molly came over and taught us to play NERTS ~ I have no idea if that is how you really spell it, but that is how you say it! Another Jonathan funny here ~
Blessings to you~
k_ranae
That is truly my goal this year ~ to become more and more Christlike every moment of every day ~ to truly love Him with all of my heart, mind, soul and strength. I am so full of myself and thoughts about me, that it breaks my heart when I realize how little of my life I truly spend being with or even thinking about the Lord. I know that some of the things I'm doing (most I hope) are things He has called me to do, but if I let those things keep me from worshipping at the feet of my Father, then I am letting the enemy of God win the battle. So, Father, in the midst of the daily things of life, teach me to keep my focus on You. In some things that is easier to do than others, but I want to glorify You in all that I do, say, think and dream. Help me to seek FIRST Your Kingdom, and let You worry about the rest.
In that vein...
I got my schoolwork back yesterday from the last workshop, and I only missed 1 1/2 questions! That calls for some serious praising the Lord! So, I just have to turn in those corrections, do my two worksheets, build a perineal model, and write all of my protocols before March ~ sounds doable! And then, I'm done with the academic portion of my schooling. I just have to get those clinical hours in, and they are coming. I am up to 5 personal clients (under supervision of course) and I so love working with them. They are all wonderful mamas, and I am so excited to be able to help them have the best pregnancy, labor, birth and postpartum possible! Please pray with me that I would be continually seeking to grow in wisdom from the Lord regarding their care, and that I would also grow in knowledge and the instruction of those God has placed over me ~ Molly and Kim are the best!
We have spent the last 2 days getting the boys room all put together with their new beds. We found a bunk bed with a trundle AND storage drawers so all 3 are in one unit. Then we also rearranged their whole room making sure there was a place for everything that needs to go in their room. Everyone worked so hard, but the results are worth every second! It looks wonderful. I don't have any pictures yet, but I'll try to get some taken tomorrow and posted so you can all see it. At least the 3 of you who actually read my blog :-)! Interestingly enough, getting the boys room cleaned up wasn't on my list of things to do, so I better go put it there so I can cross it off!
We rang in the New Year by learning a new card game. Molly came over and taught us to play NERTS ~ I have no idea if that is how you really spell it, but that is how you say it! Another Jonathan funny here ~
- When Miss Molly delivers a baby, does she raise her hands in the air and shout NERTS?
Blessings to you~
k_ranae
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